Today we welcome Krystal Kuehn to the blog.
The 10 Keys to Happy & Loving Relationships By Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC
Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a psychotherapist,
best-selling author, teacher, musician and songwriter. Krystal specializes in
helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome
barriers, heal from their past, & develop a happiness
lifestyle. For more information go to:
www.Christian-Kindle-Books.com
Published by Maximum Potential, LLC
Date of Publication:
3-30-2012
Key #1: Love is Esteem for Self and Others
- Why Loving Others Begins with Loving Ourselves
There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of
self-esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect,
kindness, and generosity. ~Nathaniel Branden
You may have heard it said that you can’t love others if you don’t love
yourself. Having self-love means you care about and like yourself in a healthy
and balanced way. It means you have self-respect and believe you are worthy of
love.
When self-love is lacking in a person’s life, it usually indicates that they
have a low self-esteem. They do not “esteem” or value themselves as highly as
they ought to. They might not really believe they are loveable. And the more
they dislike themselves, the more hindered they become in receiving love from
others. As a result, they are unable to love others as deeply as they
would like to.
It is important to note that what appears as excessive self-love in some people
is also indicative of a poor self-esteem. These individuals come across as
arrogant and boastful. However, they yearn for admiration in hopes that it will
satisfy their desperate longing for genuine love.
Loving and esteeming others fully begins
with loving and esteeming yourself in an appropriate and healthy way.
When you.....
- Allow for mistakes
and forgive your flaws
- Are patient and
understanding with yourself
- Are not
self-deprecating or self-exalting
- Are satisfied with
your best effort
- Believe in yourself
and don’t give up
- Acknowledge your good
qualities and strengths and accept your weaknesses
- Learn to like and
appreciate who you are
Then, you will be much better able to do so for others. Love,
respect, and appreciation will transfer to all other areas and relationships in
your life.
The way you esteem yourself will be directly related to the way you esteem
others. That is why a positive self-esteem is an important part of our
experience of love. Self-esteem can be built and improved as you acknowledge
and receive love in your life and as you love yourself and others as best as
you can. In its own miraculous way love increases in our lives as we give it
away. The more we give, the more we have to give. So you can start right where
you are no matter how little you may feel you have to give. There is so much
more love for you to experience.
Reflection:
Explain what esteeming yourself means to you and how you think it relates to
loving others.
How can a low self-esteem make it difficult to receive love and to love others?
Review the list of examples of loving and esteeming yourself. How do they apply
to you?
Is self-love lacking or excessive in your life? How can you bring it into
balance?
Think about the way you feel about yourself. In what ways is it helping or hindering
you from loving others?
♥ Empowering Thoughts & Affirmations
Everyone wants to be loved. Everyone is worthy of love.
I
can allow the power of love to work in my life.
I can accept myself and others as worthy of love.
I choose to
appreciate my inner strengths and value who I am.
Love is an expression and assertion of self-esteem. ~Ayn Rand
You really
have to look inside yourself and find your own inner strength, and say, “I’m
proud of what I am and who I am, and I’m just going to be myself.” ~Mariah
Carey
You must
love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being
what you are, your simple presence can make others happy. ~unknown
